What Is Love Bombing?

Today, we’re diving into a question I get all the time: What is love bombing? Maybe you've been on the receiving end of it, or you've heard stories like, “I dated this guy for three months, and he was love bombing me like crazy,” or “I was with this woman, and she was so effusive, I couldn’t take it.”

Let’s be real—love bombing isn’t exclusive to men or women. At its core, it’s the same behavior, no matter who’s doing it. It feels intense, overwhelming, and, at times, too good to be true. And often, it is.

So, let’s break it down—what is love bombing, why does it happen, and how can you avoid getting caught up in it?

What Is Love Bombing?

Love bombing is when someone showers you with excessive attention, affection, and compliments—usually way too soon in a relationship. It can happen in three stages of dating:

1. The Prospecting Phase (first few dates or interactions)
2. The Dating Phase (once you’re seeing each other regularly)
3. The Maintenance Phase (after a relationship has formed)

While love bombing can sometimes be genuine excitement, more often than not, it’s a red flag signaling insecurity, neediness, or manipulation. Let’s look at how it plays out in each phase.

Love Bombing in the Prospecting Phase

You’ve just met someone. Maybe it’s your first date. Maybe you haven’t even gone out yet—you’re still messaging. Then suddenly, they hit you with something like:

• “I’ve never felt this way before. You’re the most incredible person I’ve ever met.”
• “I saw your profile, and I just knew we were meant to be.”
• “The second you walked in the door, I felt like I was falling in love.”

Whoa. Pump the brakes.

This is way too much, too soon. Even if they genuinely feel this way, expressing such intense emotions early on is a sign that something isn’t right. Healthy dating is about letting things unfold naturally, not jumping into an emotional whirlwind before you even know each other.

Love Bombing in the Dating Phase

If you’re a few weeks or months into dating and you start getting messages like:

• “You are my everything. I don’t know how I lived without you.”
• “I love you more than anything. You complete me.”
• “I can’t go a second without thinking about you.”

It might feel flattering at first. After all, who doesn’t like to be adored? But ask yourself: Is this coming from a place of genuine connection, or is it driven by insecurity and neediness?

People who love bomb often do it because they crave validation. They’re not focused on you as a person—they’re focused on how you make them feel. That’s the difference between healthy affection and love bombing.

Love Bombing in the Maintenance Phase

Let’s say you’ve been in a relationship for a while. If the love bombing suddenly starts out of nowhere, it might actually be sincere—maybe they just feel extra grateful for you. But if they’ve been this intense since day one, it’s a sign of emotional instability.

Real love builds over time. It’s not based on constant praise, gifts, or overwhelming affection—it’s based on trust, understanding, and genuine connection.

Why Do We Fall for Love Bombing?

Simple—we crave validation. Love bombing feels amazing in the moment, just like eating junk food. It’s sweet, it’s addictive, and it gives you an emotional high. But just like candy, it’s not sustainable.

If someone constantly showers you with compliments and attention, it’s easy to get hooked. You start relying on their validation instead of building your own self-worth. That’s where the danger comes in.

How to Avoid Falling for Love Bombing

So, what can you do if you think someone is love bombing you?

1. Slow things down. If it feels too fast, it probably is. Let the relationship develop naturally.
2. Trust your gut. If something feels off, don’t ignore it. Love should feel good—but it shouldn’t feel overwhelming or forced.
3. Look for consistency. Do their actions match their words? Are they stable in how they treat you, or do they swing between extreme affection and distance?
4. Build your own self-worth. The less you rely on outside validation, the less likely you are to fall for love bombing.

Final Thoughts: Love Should Feel Real, Not Rushed

At the end of the day, love bombing isn’t real love—it’s emotional intensity disguised as connection. The best way to protect yourself? Build a strong foundation of self-love.

When you truly value yourself, you won’t need someone else’s over-the-top praise to feel worthy. You’ll recognize when affection is genuine and when it’s just a tactic to pull you in.

If you want to learn how to navigate relationships in a healthy way, let’s talk. As a relationship coach, I help people spot red flags, build confidence, and create real, meaningful connections.

Book a call with me today!, and let’s make sure your next relationship is built on real love—not love bombing.